Taking Control and Making the Most of My Summer Internship

Sometimes life can be very painful, and at other times, it can be the most beautiful thing to be alive. That’s what this summer has felt like. My internship at Frederik Meijer Gardens & Sculpture Park has made me question my future, but also helped me rediscover what I love most. While this position might look like a dream to have on a resume, I’ve come to learn that “dream jobs” don’t always feel like a dream when you’re in them, and that’s okay.

Month One: Growth in Disguise

My first few days at Meijer Gardens felt like that feeling of being “love-struck” in any new relationship. I completed onboarding, explored the gardens, and met my supervisor, Morgan. Very quickly, I grew comfortable with the work culture. It was exciting to apply the research skills I’d learned at Grand Valley State University (GVSU) in a real-world setting.

But by the second week, I started to feel unsure of myself. I found myself questioning if the projects I was doing really mattered, or at least, mattered to me. It wasn’t that the work wasn’t important. I just didn’t feel connected to it in the way I hoped. I found it insightful to learn about museum experience design and even picked up a new skill, macro coding in Excel, but deep down, I missed being creative. I missed telling stories through visuals and faces, not spreadsheets

Morgan later reached out to acknowledge her distance and validate how I was feeling, which meant more than she probably realized. It reminded me that internships aren’t meant to be perfect, but a space to make mistakes, but also to learn who you are and what you need.

The Viewfinder

By the time my first month ended, I found myself sitting with an intimidating question: What if this isn’t the right path for me? I’ve always enjoyed the world of Advertising and Public Relations (AdPR), but the actual day-to-day work didn’t feel like a fit anymore. It was hard to sit with this, but beyond this difficult time was a life-changing moment.

I knew I wanted to do more photography, so I brought it up. If I want something, I get it; that’s always been my mindset. I was asked to take photos of a retirement celebration for a long-time employee, and as I looked through the viewfinder again, I felt the spark I’d been missing. The feeling of being behind the scenes, capturing someone’s important moment, I love that. I put down the camera to ease any intimidation and spoke with Shelly and her husband, which ended up being really meaningful to me. And to be able to save these moments forever, that was it. That was me.

So, I wrote to my supervisor, shared how I was feeling, and asked for more opportunities with photography and creative direction. It was nerve-wracking, but it felt like I had finally taken ownership of my experience. Instead of trying to fit into the role, I began reshaping the role to better reflect my strengths.

Rediscovery

At the start of June, I photographed my first concert at the amphitheater, capturing performances of Chaka Khan and Sarena Rae. I met two new interns who made me feel safe, and two seasoned photographers who gave me inspiration. I felt energized in a way I hadn’t in a while.

Photography wasn’t just something I was good at; it was something I loved. I loved the way it brought me to new places, introduced me to new people, and gave me a reason to look at the world more intentionally. Every click of the shutter felt like a step back toward myself.

Image: A volunteer helping a guest before the concert gates open (shot by me).

Moving Forward

This internship isn’t what I expected, and that’s what makes it valuable. I may not walk away with a full-time role, but with something arguably more important: clarity. Clarity about what makes me “feel alive,” what kind of work fulfills me.

With that, I want to end off by saying, it’s okay if the path you’re on starts to feel unfamiliar. If that feeling of impostor syndrome is uncomfortable. My good mentor Russ once told me, ‘that feeling you get when you’re unsure about what to do, or scared about doing something—that’s the feeling of success.’ Let yourself pivot. Let yourself be surprised by what you love. And most of all, speak up, even when it’s scary. Because sometimes, the scariest things lead to the best kinds of change.

Alex is a junior studying Advertising and Public Relations (with a PR emphasis) and Business Management. He completed his first semester as an Account Associate with GrandPR and will become an Account Executive in the coming fall semester. He has a passion for photography and music and loves spending time with friends and loved ones.